2004-02-07 - 7:17 a.m.
Laura Mocks Your Favorite Songs!
That's right! For just the price of a blank cassette and shipping, you can own all those songs you love, with the digitally added mocking of Laura Clark, ON ONE TAPE!
It sounds incredible, but it's true. Incredibly true. Imagine—hearing all your favorite songs while Laura Clark sings along in a sarcastic and out-of-key voice, pretending to forget words and spilling made-up secrets about the original artist!
Such a compilation has always been far more than anyone dared hope for—until now! It's simply the best way to enjoy your favorite music. But don't take our word for it; read a celebrity testimonial!
John Stamos, Full House:
"Actually, I'd rather be recognized for my theatrical career and work in feature-length films."
And now, music fans just like you speak up about Laura Mocks Your Favorite Songs!
John X., real person:
"Oh, man, this tape is the greatest. I was totally spellbound as soon as she started singing Styx's 'Mr. Roboto' in this silly, high-pitched whine, but what really got me is when she started saying, 'Yeah, thanks a lot, Mr. Roboto' in a really sarcastic voice, over and over. It never gets old! I would recommend this tape to everyone!"
Ted P., lonely man and loathed co-worker:
"A great feature of this tape is that it's personalized, so you feel like, hey, the world's against you, but at least Laura knows you, eh? ...No, I didn't actually get any of the songs I requested, and at the end of the tape she yelled, 'Happy Birthday, Leelee!', but it's the idea, you know?"
So what are you waiting for? Simply send Laura $6 and a list of your 15 favorite songs, and know that your passport to musical paradise is on its way, as soon as Laura has downloaded the songs, spent your money on cocaine and wayward girls, and stolen some cassettes.
But that's not all! Act now, and we'll throw in a copy of Laura Does A Shitty Impression of Gary Busey Singing The Classics—absolutely free!
Now, Laura's guilty and unhealthy obsession with Gary Busey is your gain! From "The Real McCoy" to "I Can't Help Falling In Love With You", you'll love hearing Laura as her shitty impression of Gary Busey takes off in this spectacular bonus tape!
Act now—quantities aren't limited, per se, but eventually Laura will stop finding this funny. Don't be the only one on your block without Laura Mocks Your Favorite Songs!
